Blessings & Challenges…Downsizing After 27 Years

We have been blessed beyond measure to have called this place home for the last 27 years. We’ve raised our children here to adulthood. We’ve shared many joyful times and some struggles. We haven’t lived a perfect life but we certainly did the best we knew how. When we moved here 27 years ago, we were so thankful for how God blessed us beyond what we thought or imagined.

The time for us to turn the key for the last time is just two month’s away…

This past spring my husband, Kevin, and I decided to get serious about selling our home. Ideally, we would have waited until Spring 2021. With the uncertainty of our economy, we decided to move forward sooner rather than later. We were hoping to have it on the market by Election Day but that didn’t happen, and it’s ok. We’ve been working to get it into a condition we felt good about while also preparing it for the next owner. It’s been a scurry of projects, purging and moving items to the storage unit, cleaning out and freeing up. Preparing our home came with some unexpected challenges. We’re learned more about ourselves and what’s important to each of us. All this has occurred while dealing with the election and COVID-19 chaos but we are persevering!

We’ve been sorting through everything and getting rid of LOTS! Part of the preparation of selling involves “staging” a house. It’s getting the house in shape so that the rooms can be seen for their size as well as the walls and windows, uncluttered with less pictures and stuff in our case. It’s showing it in it’s best possible condition.

During this process, I started with trying to sell our dining room set. After talking with others, turning a dining room into an office space has become popular. During COVID, many are working from home. Not a soul was interested in purchasing this set.

As you can see, it was in great shape but with a 1980’s style. I tried to donate it but most missions weren’t interested during COVID, except for one. Knowing the mission that took it and all they do for our Capital Region, it will be put to good use!

When my office was on the dining room table, it felt chaotic and disorganized. This table was a holding place for many items not meant for its purpose. The bookshelves you see were not in the same room. My standup desk was on the table. I’ve moved this desk in from another room, updated the ceiling fixture and brought the bookshelves together. All my work now is in one place. This room is the way I’ve wanted it for years. It literally took less than a weekend to put it together.

Hindsight being 20/20; Now that this room is organized, I can see the negative brain power it took. For so long, I looked at this room and wished it looked different. This same brain power was present with squeaky doors and overloaded closets too. It literally can take a half hour to fix a squeaky door or clean out and donate items from a closet. It’s freeing for my mind to just get it done! I didn’t realize how much space these issues filled my thoughts.

With the time spent agonizing, I should have made the necessary changes sooner. Lesson learned…if it needs fixing or changing and within my control, fix it or change it! If you have similar challenges with a project on your mind, make a plan! Make a choice to get it done. If you’re like me, you’ll be glad you did.

There has been a range of emotions. This process has triggered some sweet memories, challenges, and some sadness as I learn to “let go” of this beautiful place we’ve called home for 27 years. It hasn’t been an easy process.

For years, we’ve talked about getting rid of so much that we’ve kept for too long. We don’t need all we’ve stored. In our basement, for example, many years ago Kevin built huge shelving units. A few years back, we put it all into plastic bins to create an organized accumulation of stuff. Over the years, we’ve put so many items in the basement in the hopes we may need them someday. Needless to say, we’ve collected LOTS! Lesson learned…get rid of more vs. holding onto items just in case we might need them. We have no idea what is in the basement. If we’ve needed something, we’d go out and buy it. Let the purging here begin! Anyone need some stuff?! :)

This next lesson surprises me…I’m more attached to my stuff than I expected. We’ve talked about retirement and downsizing for years. Now that we are moving forward in this process, my realty doesn’t match my previous words. I’ve talked about getting rid of so much, how I don’t need all of it and will donate or giveaway, etc. etc. etc.

My husband is much better at releasing these items than I’ve been. Going through them with Kevin has made it easier for me to let go. He is one to say we cannot fit it in our 10’x20’ storage unit. He helps me adjust my perspective. If it won’t fit, we won’t keep it. We’re not renting another storage bay!

Everything we have takes a space in our brain. Getting rid of so much has helped me to understand this first hand. It’s freeing for my mind. I have lots more to donate but I’m on my way. It’s like anything in life…what we practice, we get better at. Compared to when we first started, it’s getting easier to donate and give items away than it was initially.

I’ve also learned that it helps to revisit a bin or a shelf to then find additional items we don’t want. Letting go of what we don’t need or doesn’t matter in the bigger picture is getting easier. It’s really a process and not an event. God is helping me to release these “treasures” so someone else can enjoy them.

The irreplaceable memories will remain with us as we walk out of this house for the last time.

Sorting and purging has brought back some sweet, joyful memories. Sorting through old pictures I haven’t seen in a while has brought smiles and tears too, reminiscing when my children were young. I’ve found baby clothing and games we used to play as a family. It brought back sweet memories of the times we were together everyday. I miss those joyful moments from the good ole’ days.

If you’re a parent of adult children, I’m guessing you can relate to what I’m writing. I really appreciate these sweet memories and revisiting them on this journey. My babies are now 26 and 24 years old.

So Kevin and I have had numerous discussions and some heated. What to do with all this stuff we’ve accumulated over these many years?! There have been items that I’ve thought we should donate and Kevin thought we should keep and vice versa. Over the years, we’ve taken the attitude that “his stuff is my stuff and my stuff is his stuff”. It’s all OUR stuff! What we’ve learned has helpful us through this situation. Rather than assuming and saying, “Hey, I’m going to get rid of X”. It’s better to say, “Are you ok with me donating X item?”

After 34 years of marriage, we’re still learning about each other. It’s during our challenges that we have grown in our relationship and the same is true now. We are learning how to navigate this new chapter. It’s one we’ve not walked through in the past. It’s learning through trial and error to find what works for us. Communication has been key. There have been some surprises for sure but there is no one I’d rather be experiencing this time with than with Kevin.

Walking through these memories that we’ve made has helped me appreciate this home even more. We’ve been blessed beyond measure to have lived here but we are also excited for new chapters and what’s to come.

We have excitement on the horizon for sure. The plan, at some point, is to purchase a 5th wheel trailer and travel the USA, into Canada and Alaska. We’ve already purchased the dually truck. For those that don’t know what a dually is…It has four wheels across the back and can pull a camper like the one pictured below. We’ve been planning this adventure for a couple of years now, researching and listening to our favorite “full-timers”. It’s those that have been living full-time on the road for years. There is a whole community from parents with children to retired folks to single women to young people working remotely while on the road. We’ve learned a ton from their YouTube channels. As a result, we have a notebook full of helpful how-to’s, insights and suggestions. We’ve learned so much and are so thankful for You, Me & The RV, Adventure Endeavor, Changing Lanes, and the Getaway Couple to name a few. We are thankful they’ve taken the time to share their knowledge with us.

So a week after Election Day, our home went on the market. Five days later, we had a signed contract for sale. Six families came through with three offers, two of which were greater than the asking price. Blessings are abundant, and praise God for what He’s doing! If you think of us, please pray that all goes as planned with the closing on our home.

Two realtors warned us to get ready because they believed our home would sell quickly in this seller’s market. For those that don’t know, it means there are more buyers than sellers. And, they were right!

The hardest part will be saying “goodbye for now” to the family and solid friendships we’ve developed over the years. Kevin and I were born and raised in this area. It’s been the only hometown we’ve known. Our family is here. Our friends are here. Our roots are here. We will be back because of the relationships that we have with these special people. The house, yes, we will miss and get beyond it. It’s these special people in my life that will bring us back to this area. With all the social media outlets, it’s easier to stay in touch too. We will be back for sure to visit and celebrate the holidays.

We also know that God has been leading us, and for a while. We have so many God “winks” and how He’s guiding us. We don’t know where He’s leading but we are being faithful and stepping out of our comfort zone. We are thankful for what He’s showing us and how He’s guiding and providing.

We aren’t sure where we are going. We have our popup and plan to drive south. It sounds kind of crazy and mindboggling, doesn’t it? We are preparing and will be ready when the time is right. Selling the house frees us up to make this travel easier, continuing on the path that the Lord has set before us.

Excited for the adventures to come but also sadness over the loss of the life we’ve known. Thankfully, we will stay in our home through Christmas. That’s an answer to prayer too. It’s an opportunity to be together as a family one last time and to have closure for us all.

I’ll leave you with this final thought about this wooden plaque that hangs over my fireplace. It’s been hanging there for the last couple of years. This is the place that we’ve called “Home Sweet Home” for so long.

When the kids were little, whenever we arrived at home I would say…”Here we are…Home Sweet Home!” They remember. I actually still say it today, just not as often.

When we settle again, God willing, this plaque will be hung in our “new” home where we will create new memories. Part of our journey of traveling is to figure out where we are to eventually settle and to purchase another home.

Whenever I look at this plaque, it makes me smile. It reminds me that our home is wherever we create it. It’s about the people in the home and not so much about the house or the stuff within.

God speed, it shall be….

“Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen.
Ephesians 3:20-21”